That Vacillating Girl

(Poems from my teen years)

*
Shoes in
various sizes
colors, shapes
Of all the shoes
only one pair was
what she
wanted
for her 19th birthday
When she found one
her eyes wandered off
for one better fit
like she did when
choosing
her potential fiancé
Days flew by, undecided
She went back to the store
to notice the shoes were taken
As she missed the shoes
she envisioned the man,
misty-eyed
Once he was
nearly
hers

*

This indecisiveness of me ultimately ended with my marriage.  Have I ever regretted or compared my husband with the man who once nearly mine?  Not
even once, to this day.  Mainly because I thought it was disgraceful thing to do.
Or, I loved the man who fathered my children.

During the decades of our marriage we’ve had some ups and downs.  But we
managed to stay in marriage.  At times, it wasn’t easy.  Times like that, we reminded ourselves that the divorce would bring unpleasant side effects.

As we get older we become more like good friends.  Or, like the cliche, we become like a pair of old shoes, feeling more comfortable than new ones.  I still
have a tendency of vacillating on some matters.  To me, it’s a form of thoughtfulness, which plays an important roll in keeping the marriage in track.
For that, I suppose, I should be thankful for the particular flaw of mine.  What
an irony!

(Byung A. Fallgren Blog)

5 thoughts on “That Vacillating Girl

  1. In this post I tried to point out my indecisiveness sometimes brings me negative result, like losing a man I once wanted, for example, when I was a girl. Yes, many people have less than we do and we should be grateful. 🙂 Thank you for taking time for visiting. I was thinking about visiting you.

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