I’ve neither seen you nor
heard of you, yet I sense you,
see you in my dream
feel you in my heart
I’m your future fiancé,
wife, mother of your child
Tonight, lying in my bed,
I feel you weep,
staring at the gun in your hand
Don’t do that, my love!
Why would you give up
your life over those who
snapped your dream,
plunged you into depression?
If you cannot help it,
seek medical help, my love
I maybe unseen by you
but I see you
in my dream,
feel you in my heart
See me, my love
Feel me
I’m your future wife
I need you!

*

This is written for both men and women who are suicidal victims of depression or any other form; “Unseen Woman” can be their family and friends.  Statistics show
suicide rate, especially among young people, rises in U.S. Being aware of the signs of people around you and help them can lower the rate.

(by Byung A. Fallgren.  Byung A. Fallgren Blog)

Being a single, you are vulnerable
to emotional wound, tend to be
charmed by good-looking people
without knowing their inner side
His or her poetry seem to mean
something about their lives even though
it’s a mere description of an image

When a person of interest is mysterious
and you cannot figure it out with
your common sense and intelligence,
avoid him or her then find another
who is clear as crystal
Save your soul from farther chasing
a phantom in your wild imagination

You are lovable, my friends
You deserve someone beautiful
and have a wonderful life

*
I don’t know what prompted me to write this.
I guess I’m having a senior moment.  : )

(by Byung A. Fallgren)

Her voice is
in the singing birds
Her smile is
in the morning sun
Her kiss is
in the breeze
Her warm embrace is
in the soft petals
Oh Mother, I see you
everywhere!

(by Byung A. Fallgren)

Spring is vibrant,
raw and impatient
Autumn is full and
reticent with resignation
Summer is fervent,
thoughtful, semi-mature
I wish summer is forever,
tugging at the fleeting season
like an estranged lover
Unfinished work need
to be done before
the end of the summer
but I’ll let it go,
cherish the days we
laughed and
cried together

REFLECTING ON SPRING AND SUMMER OF 2017 // FROM THE NATURE TO HUMAN

• Pruned the new growths from the dead apple tree’s root in my yard.  I started
  it from a sapling over two decades ago, so it’s like my child.
• Pruned and fertilized the lilac shrubs that returned with full bloom from the
  nearly dead condition years before, after getting hit by the disease.  This shrub
  is also like my child.
• Helped the robin couple build their nest behind the fake owl by moving the owl
  a bit farther from the wall, which brought the disaster to the robins.  They lost their
  hatchlings to a real owl in early spring.  The birds then built a new nest in the
  cottonwood tree–smart–successfully produced the second round new hatchlings.
  It all happened in my yard.  So, the birds are also like my um…special guests.  They
  are gone now and only the empty nest behind the fake owl tells their sad, early
  spring.
• Bade farewell to the girlfriend who passed on suddenly; shocked, regretted that
  we hadn’t been together often.  Realization:  Nothing lasts forever.
• Grieving again for my editor’s passing, jolting my book business.  Lost another good  friend.
• Attended my daughter’s wedding ceremony, culminating the summer with cheers!There is other stuff I haven’t mentioned but theses are the ones that will stay in my
  memory for a long time.  I hope coming autumn and winter will be better.  Having
  some hope is good; it drives us move forward.In advance, I bid farewell to the summer by saying it in Korean:  Annyong (goodbye), summer, until next year!  By then I’ll be one year older and gain some
  more wrinkles as well.
  Oh, I want to take one last look at the empty nest.  Considering the tragedy of the baby robins, I might tear it down.  Lesson learned:  As far as building bird nest goes, birds are way better than human.

  

  (by Byung A. Fallgren)

Each perl, a sum of
her patience, hard work,
refined by the stormy waves
and moonless nights

embraces the serene face reflects
on particular memory glistening like
a shard on sands

Butterfly casts a shadow upon the mask
that has become her alter ego, to disturb

the sediment that’s now merely
a sand grain of yesterdays

*

I’ve been posting shenanigans over two years now,
getting to know good people who would read my posts
regardless good or bad.  It’s time that I rev up my site;
post better, interesting ones, etc.  But I’m not quite ready
to change anything anytime soon; I’m always busy–who isn’t?
But I promise I’ll do it someday.  Meanwhile, I hope my friends
would stick with me, or it’ll be just a journal–without them I would’ve
disappeared long ago.  For that, I love you, my friends.

(by Byung A. Fallgren)

Sunday mornings are slow for me
unless something disturbs me in bed
like the neighbor yelling at her dog
“Stay in your own yard!”
Half awakened, I wonder where my own yard is
It’s where I live, of course
Once I left my yard across the ocean
for my dream, so did many others
And look what we have here now!
So you are not yelling at me, are you, lady?
Wise God didn’t tell Adam and Eve
to stay in their own garden
he only told them not to eat the apple
because he knew that eventually their children will
leave the garden with good reason for another planet
No need to complain that they ruined food by spicing it
You can always make a choice for what you want
Lift your heart and walk the dog
Enjoy the colors of this beautiful sunny day

*
This was written long ago also.  The lady was my old neighbor who used to yell at
her dog to stay in her yard.  At first, I thought she was nice, keeping her dog from
doing his stuff in other people’s yard.  As I got to know her I realized her shouting
had another purpose–expressing her opinion on my being her neighbor and beyond.
Later, we bought a little house in a quiet neighborhood where I could stay in bed late
on Sunday mornings.

(by Byung A. Fallgren)

Life is a constant battle of
dealing with pitfalls
We grow mature as we
learn to turn trouble
into an inspiration
that propels our lives

*
I wrote this long ago to guide myself because learning to turn trouble into an
inspiration without anger or frustration is not easy.  Even now that I’m older it’s
still true to me.

(by Byung A. Fallgren)

Not every experience
makes us grow
Some mistakes become
a lesson learned
while some are nothing
but time wasted or worse
Well-planned experience
makes it worthwhile

(by Byung A. Fallgren.  byungafallgren.com)

Morning unfolds, gently touching
my numbed wings by the chill, windy night,
encouraging me to go outside to the sunlight

I crawl out the refuge to sunbathe,
unaware of the imminent danger of
becoming a prey of a black bird
then the usual lady came to rescue me
Thankful but I drag myself away

My wings begin to regain strength
when suddenly it showered on me
she jerks the garden hose
It’s you again, butterfly!
Lovingly she stares at me

I then see my ex-lover flies by,
looking gorgeous as ever
I hurry after her, hoping we get together again,
without getting shot down by the garden-hose-rain,
for unpredictable and jealous is the lady’s mind

*

Observing this butterfly reminds me that humans and animals, including insects, share
similarity in many aspects of life.  Buddhists believe in reincarnation after death; we reincarnate in any forms:  birds, animals, etc.  They chase pesky insects away, instead of killing, using smoke or scent.  It’s good to know that despite the mass killings committed
by certain groups nowadays, respect for life is still alive and well not only by religious groups but also good people in general.

(by Byung A. Fallgren.  Byung A. Fallgren’s Blog.)

My wings are vulnerable to the cold wind
as my heart bleeds for the estranged lover
The only strength in me is butterfly instinct
that guides me in the wind

I live by the rule of Nature,
enjoy being me, my ability
as the shrubs grow, loving sun
with joy of providing the shelter
to the weary one

It’s getting dark and the wind
bellows in the juniper,
me clinging onto the leaf for my life,
amazed by the sudden change
as if our separation isn’t enough a pain

I fear the long night, predators,
the lady with a camera

After the windy night
will come the warm morning light

When my wings warm again
I’ll fly to her, my dream; it won’t be vain

(by Byung A. Fallgren.  Byung A. Fallgren’s Blog.)